Elizabeth Rose Murray: building a novel

Site has moved but is still running...

2009-05-15T10:21:00.000-07:00

Its not forgotten

2008-05-26T11:34:00.001-07:00

Its the focus of June. ´Lily is developing into a stronger and somewhat more sinister character - less puritanical - and she needs more time to be digested. What do you think would be the worst thing that Lily could do to Max? Bear in mind 1. in a relationship 2. she already left her fiance for Max and 3. he is a drunk. Let your minds go wild...make some suggestions! Lets see what I can achieve for you.

On holiday in australia...

2008-04-03T11:37:00.001-07:00

Will add more after May 1st when I´ve returned. Come back then...

Why I´m not using the word fuck for my opening word

2008-03-09T07:50:00.000-07:00

Some excellent thoughts from The Book Doctor herself:

"Taking the 1st sentences out of context I agree that the dialogue opener looks strong. But in the context of the entire first paragraph - which was the context in which I read the 2 comparisons - I was instantly drawn to 'Max was blind drunk and angry.'

3 reasons. Firstly, Elizabeth has quite a descriptive style and so the short, sharp sentence contrasts with the rest of the paragraph. Secondly, it stands out without trying to stand out. And thirdly I feel that opening sentences should mirror some of the content of the book. A huge part of the novel is Max's alcoholism, by getting this into the opening sentence, his character is set up immediately.

So for me, I find it difficult to grade an opening sentence if I can't see what follows."

*******************************************************************************

OK - so i know better than to just follow blindly what one person says but the reasoning is exactly as my own. I could make an impact with the word fuck opening my novel - but if it creates less impact - why bother, right?

Can I really start a novel with the word fuck?

2008-02-09T03:12:00.000-08:00

1. Do you think I would lose an audience because of it, or do you think they´d be thankful for a book with balls?

2. Is it realistic, or is it trying too hard?

3. Are there any other books out there that start with fuck as a first word?

What do you think of this passage? Please leave comments below. Be brutal - I can take it.

2008-01-30T11:58:00.000-08:00

Together Max and the kitten went back to the bedroom. He hauled off his shoes, tugging at the laces and then finally scooping one shoe off using the toes of his other for leverage. The prize gift was deposited on the floor and Max kissed his finger, and then pressed it to the creature’s head. The alcohol filled him too much now, giving him heart burn and earth shattering belches that erupted with precision timing and made the kitten shake.

“Time for a piss.”

A sound like a distant car door slamming ricocheted through the emptiness. Max cocked his ear, and stayed still for a moment.

“Is that you, Lily?”

The thick black blanket of stairwell and corridor was filled with his voice. Max groped the bathroom door handle and shoved it, relieving himself a little in the wrong direction firstly, and then with his eyes closed he swayed to the tune of his own piss splattering the floor. He heaved an appreciative sigh, shook, zipped up and started back towards the emptiness. It was then that he found her.

“Fuck” he screamed, almost too loud to be heard. “Fuck”

The curdled tones echoed throughout the flat. His hands clutched his hair and again he screamed. The tiny kitten crawled under the bed and lay down, trembling.

poll results - what ruins a book for you?

2008-01-30T11:44:00.000-08:00

The voting has closed and there were 23 votes. Apparently, what ruins a book for you is overly complicated language, a weak ending and a lack of suspense; so i´ll be ditching the thesaurus (well, not quite!) and making sure the plot thickens and the twist and turns are in abundance.

In addition, the most popular name for the book keeps coming up as Tasting Freedom and Moribund...the original title of Chastise and Compromise is a slow runner - a bit of a lame donkey in fact. But I was playing with the idea that "Moribund?" is better as a question, rather than just plain old "Moribund". The poll opens again...

And in terms of book length, you´re an avid lot. A book is not a book if its not at least 150 pages long. Looks like the length is hitting the correct target!

break from novel - redraft in february - until then...

2008-01-18T11:03:00.000-08:00

Please take my polls on the right hand side and help me figure a few things out?

nano is over but what about the following:

2007-12-15T13:51:00.000-08:00

My MC used to work for a restaurant but now works on her own... i thought there would be more about food in the book than there is currently - how important do you think mentioning the reasons behind the switch to working for herself is?

Max´s mother

2007-11-27T03:58:00.000-08:00

OK. His mother was originally going to have also tried to commit suicide and be a drunk. Now however, there is no need for her in the story. The poor woman is redundant. So, do you think it would be convincing for her to have successfully committed suicide...it is a story of hope despite the dark topic, and this way Max can have a chance to get his drinking in order and put things right...thoughts please!

nano is completed but...

2007-11-27T03:12:00.000-08:00

I have completed the nano challenge, so thank you for your help all. However, it doesn't stop there. I am continuing with the draft zero, up to around 70,000 words probably though much less intensive.

Then, February will be first draft, followed by a second draft in May. If it´s good enough, it will go to publishers. If it´s not, more drafts will follow.

So what I´m asking is...stick around? I´ll be needing more help for sure. If you know anyone else who might help, please send them the link. Oh, and thanks again all.

What company is my brother the CEO of

2007-11-12T08:02:00.000-08:00

he is older than me: nearing 50. he is rich, powerful, mean, and arrogant.
He has his own office and is the CEO of a company.
What company could it be?

What jazz bar did I meet Simon in?

2007-11-08T04:25:00.001-08:00

I met my previous partner Simon in a jazz bar in central London.

It was mainstream, playing Kenny G type jazz.

What was it called?

What is my street called?

2007-11-08T04:23:00.001-08:00

My cottage is 300 years old, overlooking the sea from up high on the cliffs.

It is in the north of England in the fictional village of Axworth. What is it called?

a preview of draft zero

2007-11-01T10:19:00.001-07:00

As a distant crash of waves broke upon the shore, Max stood at an odd angle in the doorway. He had carefully manoeuvred the three rough cut stone steps in the darkness, taking more than twice the time that the daylight hours required. The steps had proved even more cumbersome due to the oversized cardboard box he held close to his chest. He had gripped the box so tightly that the edges were beginning to contort; creating additional seams to those that had been in the original design. The box swayed a little almost toppling Max over where a railing had once been.

Max was feeling a little smug. He had half expected a less than friendly welcome committee. His shoes had reverberated hollow thumps around the narrow street as he’d made his way home, and although he was mindful to use lighter footsteps as he passed the Sanderson´s window, (knowing they slept in the front bedroom and seeing that the light was out) he knew he would have been noticed by many a prying eye. But the heavy door sat dark, silent and as broody as the cold winds that cut through his sweat soaked shirt. Lily would be so happy with him this time. “Stop talking, start doing” was her irritatingly precise mantra. He could hear her words now and they made him smile. He couldn’t wait to see her face. Plus, it would help make up for the fact he hadn’t come in again last night.

I live in a village called Axworth.

2007-10-27T07:40:00.000-07:00

Its beautiful, and although it buzzes with tourism it maintains a certain amount of calm. It´s certainly a charming place. I live in a lovely cottage of whitewashed stone which helps protect from the elements. I overlook the sea from the kitchen and have balcony doors which open out onto a small terrace - big enough to entertain, but small enough to be cosy. This often inspires me when I´m cooking. The den also overlook the sea, as does our bedroom. the guest room looks onto the cobbled streets below.

I love this old cottage. It embarrasses me that it was bought for me, but at least I can call it home. The only problem is the noise. I see Mr and Mrs Sanderson looking askew at times and I'm sure they've heard the furore but are too polite to say anything. Thats how it works around here. It is a fishing village after all. The couple on the other side only stay here at weekends and holidays. They live in the city the rest of the time, in some busy overworked career. Sometimes I envy their seemingly placid and dull lives...

The village is based around a church, but of course I don´t attend. My neighbours don´t either which surprises me in the case of the Sandersons. We have lots of local shops and markets, and have managed to stay away from souvenir shops. Our charm is our food. Once I´d visited here, i knew i had to live here. It was a dream come true.

Well, the summer is just about to arrive and of course, this means longer hours, more socialising and more opportunities for Max to lose control. No matter. We´ll see what the summer brings.

max

2007-10-24T11:53:00.000-07:00

Max is a high flying PR consultant. His job requires networking and drinking with clients so his problem often goes unnoticed until its too late. I don´t get to hear it all. What has Max been up to now?

How do i move forward?

2007-10-23T06:35:00.000-07:00

I am feeling nervous. I been running my small catering business for some time. Now its time to get moving further forward. I currently provide catering for parties in the village and the city, lunches in the city (delivered by mike, a local man of 65 who is gruff but good hearted and soon to be widowed) How would I research the expansion?Who else could my clients be in a small seaside village? How do I move forward?

Don't let me stagnate before i've even come to life...

I have a home

2007-10-21T06:26:00.000-07:00

I live in a small fishing hamlet in the north of england. tell me...

what do you like most/least about fishing villages?

some changes...

2007-10-20T05:03:00.000-07:00

In reaction to certain posts etc...the following changes have come about:

1. I am indeed a caterer, but instead of deserts I specialise in organic foods.

2. I do not know any siblings...this is going to happen in the book. I will find out that I have some.

3. Max´s mother is no longer perfect. She is returning to the original idea of having a drink problem herself.

Ruby is now rich...very rich. Not that Max is aware, as Lily is determined to create her own life and be independant.

In what scenario would Ruby end up telling me that I have siblings? Why have they been secret? What happens next?

my brother and sister

2007-10-18T10:30:00.000-07:00

My brother Sebastian is about to turn 50 and my sister Claudia is 45. I was an unexpected late child, and neither of us know anything about our parentage except that we each have a different father. We are very mismatched due to the generation gap, and also there is some jealousy involved on all sides. Here is another question:

Am I close to either or both siblings?

I have a job!

2007-10-18T02:01:00.000-07:00

I am now a cook. I am a specialist dessert supplier working from home.

"M. said...: I could see Lily as more of a personal cook, who caters to smaller parties and events. Her childhood would alienate her from most social interactions, so I easily imagine a preference to work alone."

Anyone got any favourite recipes for me or for me to search? Anyone know any specific equipment I would need?

A suggestion for rebecca's problem

2007-10-16T06:19:00.000-07:00

Anonymous said...

I think that Rebecca is having liver failure. She donated part of her liver to her son, because of his ongoing alcoholism. She is having trouble finding a match

15 October 2007 20:20

Do you think this would work?

Do I smoke?

2007-10-16T06:07:00.000-07:00

I would like to know. Please answer here.

title suggestions

2007-10-16T06:00:00.000-07:00

All a bit of fun but according to Lulu Titlescorer the title chastise and compromise has a 55.4% chance of being a bestselling title!

any other suggestion based on what you know about me?

In response to Beckoir

2007-10-16T00:57:00.001-07:00

Yes, I know my mother was a prostitute. I often witnessed her with various “uncles”. She’s not the most discreet, yet one of the biggest snobs I’ve ever met. She’s pretentious and selfish, and not the most endearing. But she is fun and people love her vivacity. I don’t know who my father is, but I assume that I am the result of one of the unions my mother enjoyed.

The Breezyweek interview

2007-10-16T00:51:00.000-07:00

Breezyweek: Where is she? When is she? Is she rich or poor?

Lily: I live in London in 2007. I have enough money to live and treat myself.

Breezyweek: Does she go by her own surname or her partner's?

Lily: My name is Lily Alders. My partner is Max Davies. Even if I married I would keep my own name.

Breezyweek: What nationality is she? What race? What age?

Lily: My mother is English, but her surname is Dutch in origin. My mother is very secretive about her past and I know nothing about my family, including my father, outside of my relationship with my mother and my siblings.

Breezyweek: Does she work? At what? Is she a cook-from-the-start homemaker or a working career woman?

Lily: My career is currently other. More suggestions are required. But I have decided that I work from home. PLEASE VOTE IN THE POLL.

Breezyweek: Do they have children? Does she have children separately from this partner?

Lily: I have no children.

Breezyweek: When you say alcoholic are you talking wall-falling pink-elephant-seeing down-and-out or someone depressed and selfish maintaining a mean little habit?

Lily: alcoholic meaning will self destruct and ruin work, relationships, health…with little or no control.

Breezyweek: Does she have a drink problem herself? Does she drink at all? Does she smoke?

Lily: I do drink, and will get drunk, but no drink problem. Do I smoke? YOU DECIDE

We are now named

2007-10-14T14:55:00.000-07:00

I am now called Vivelle Alders (Lily). My mother Ruby is 74, an ex high class prostitute, and my siblings Claudia and Sebastian are somewhat older than me. My boyfriend is Max Davies (thanks poll people!) and he is alcoholic. This stems from the death of a playmate at a young age, for which Max feels guilty. His mother Rebecca is a perfect mother, except for her hidden problem...which Max also feels guilty about.

Next question: What is Rebecca´s hidden problem?
Next poll: What is Lily´s profession?

My mother...

2007-10-13T10:12:00.000-07:00

My mother is called Ruby, and is now based upon the character suggestion for Mrs Johnson from the nano forum; “an elderly woman that used to be a high-class whore in her youth.” She is a strong, sexual and manipulative woman who has tried to control me her whole life. I have run away from her and feel liberated. I do not feel guilty about this; its a futile emotion.

With thanks to Gerhi

2007-10-13T09:13:00.000-07:00

Lily can be a name on its own, but my actual name is now Vivelle, thanks to the nano forum.

I do not know my father. The name Lily was given to me by my mother. I call myself Vivelle when I am being provocative, when I want to escape from myself for a little while, or when I first meet people, to be different. I am called Vivelle by my mother when she is being manipulative and by Max when he is scared.

I do need a surname. What can my surname be?

Kylia´s interview

2007-10-12T10:49:00.000-07:00

Kylia: Tell me, why does Max drink? What is he running from? What is he afraid of?

Lily: Max drinks because it is his coping mechanism. He has seen it in his family. It has been his life for a long time, undetected. He is the original party king. He equates this with friendship. Max drinks even when he doesn’t want to. He is intelligent, and so this causes him even more distress. He is trapped in a cycle. He is running away from himself. He is afraid of himself, and of people not liking him the way that he doesnt like himself. Sometimes he is running away from me.

Kylia: Tell me what makes Lily so self-sacrificing, so willing to be there for someone who is never there for her?

Lily: I am not self sacrificing. I have an alcoholic mother (Ann) , sister (???) and brother (Ben) so I guess I´m less sensitive to the condition. I am intelligent, and understand Max.

Max is gentle, loving and kind. He is not thoughtful, or perhaps I could say too thoughtful! He thinks about stuff too much then almost believes his thoughts have come true, whilst the rest of the world is oblivious.

Max is the nicest person I’ve ever met and it’s his inherent need to do good that usually causes the hurt; his own lack of self worth, and sense of disappointing others (which he then does and the spiral continues).

Kylia: Tell me why they love each other, how they love each other?

Lily: We love each other because we understand each other. We do so very deeply and passionately. This means huge rows, great sex, lots of laughter and lots of noise. Our relationship has huge upturns and downturns which they both require. It’s a kind of twisted stability; out of order comes chaos...

Kylia: Does Lily cry at night when Max doesn't show up? Where does Max go when he wants to get away?

Lily: I cry, or I read book, or listen to Beethoven (thanks to anonymous, blog post 1). I paint, or get petulant and go meet friends and have a good time, but in the back of my mind I worry. Sometimes I just sleep. Sometimes it is difficult, sometimes it is not. It is often just a fact.

Max goes to bars where no one knows him. Max loses himself in the internet. Max eats lots. Max surrounds himself with friends. Max goes for long walks. Sometimes, I don’t know where Max goes, and neither does he.

Who am I?

2007-10-12T09:34:00.000-07:00

My name is Lily. My boyfriend is alcoholic. His name is Max.

I am not trying to paint a bad picture of my life. I love my life, I love Max and Max loves me. Simple! What I am trying to do is give a glimpse, and get an answer to the question “Who am I?” (You should be familiar with that one, yourself).

Drinking is only a part of Max, and Max is only a part of me. It just happens that both have a lot of impact. What do I mean?

The impact:

1. Max does not turn up for work
2. Max not turn up at home
3. Lily does not eat or sleep
4. Max phones to say "meet me from the bus, I’m on my way" then is not there
5. Max has aggressive hangovers
6. Lily shouts when she doesn’t want to
7. Max feels hatred towards himself
8. Promises are made that can’t be kept, even though they’re meant

But this is not Max, and it’s certainly not Max everyday.

Max does not yet have a surname. He needs a name. Maybe this will help him. Maybe you can help him? Or do you need to know more?

Who am I?

2007-10-12T01:41:00.000-07:00

It is always said that you should write about what you know. Yet people also say you shouldn´t air your dirty laundry in public (another cliche I despise). But I have good reason to write this. I am not real.

I am a character. Soon I will be appearing in a book, or the book will appearing through me. There are two reason for this blog.

1. I need to exist
2. I need to grow.

I am an alter ego, research and guidance. I am laced with truth and untruth. I have no idea where I will go, how I will impact the story or life. Yet, this is where it all begins. This is where I take form.

With your help. So tell me, "Who am I?"